If you got a problem with how we do things, these are the ones you can complain to. They won’t do anything about it, but you can gripe all you want!
General Mistress: Wax On, Get Off
The head honcho. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert’s legacy. The GM is not simply a figurehead for the hash, rather they personify the hash’s character (or lack thereof.) They lead with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the officers, they give inspiration, direction, and vision to all.
General Mistress and Web Wanker: Slippery When Sober
The head honcho. The chairman of the board. The big cheese. The HMFIC. The guiding light. Gispert’s legacy. The GM is not simply a figurehead for the hash, rather they personify the hash’s character (or lack thereof.) They lead with a dynamic strength that permeates the fabric of the organization. Both directly, and through the officers, they give inspiration, direction, and vision to all.
If you’re reading this, the Web Wanker has half-assed their job enough times to be sort of done. Keeper of the sacred intertubes that deliver hash misinformation.
Religious Adviser and Beer Meister: HANDGINA
He gets us drunk and then tries to get us all to shut up and pay attention so he can run circle. Sorry bro, you can’t have your Malort and drink it too!
Founder and Daddy of the Bushwhackers!
Haberdasher: MOUSE MILKER
We got swag and we look good in it! We got swag because this fine-ass wanker gets it for us! Want some swag? Come to the trail and humble yourself before the Haberdasher.
Founder and Mommy of the Bushwhackers!
Hare Raiser and Hash Cash: Super Prick
She who manages to wrangle all the wankers and keeps up with our money and our calendar. If you want to volunteer to lead this merry band of miscreants around Nashville, you have to go through her. If you show up to trail, you better be ready to pay this lady or she will let Chilly Bean lick your face!